Smith Kids MSU Tailgate

Smith Kids MSU Tailgate
Dominica, Veronica, Rebel and Miranda

Sunday, May 29, 2011

Must have been true!

All of my crazy predictions about the Daniels and the Smiths must have been true since nobody has been on here to dispute my recently published siblings update.  I must say, I am surprised that the Daniels have not written at least a short reprisal.  And I would have thought Rebel would have returned a joke aimed back at me by now, but I am not complaining.  I'm too busy relishing in the glory of my wonderful imagination!  I am appreciating Jeff's imagination too because he gave me some of the ideas I used.

Anyhow, I do know Dominica and Ivar are still busy making flour, pasta and planting their enormous garden so I doubt we will hear from them for awhile.  At least they did send a brief update last week so I will leave them alone (for now). Watch out though guys if you wait too long to write on here Jeff and I will think up something equally crazy for you to be doing with your televisions too! 

Right now Jeff, Kara and Hazel are watching Funniest Home Videos at home.  AJ is with me at Grandma's house so I can use the computer.   While I am working I can hear Backyardiggans playing in the background so he is getting a little TV fix too! I am just trying to get the Brainy Day 5K information out to those who are interested as quickly as possible so I sent it off to another batch of potential runners/walkers.  Hope to see all of our faithful followers at the starting line come July 16th!

Vern Out

Thursday, May 26, 2011

Sibling updates

The long awaited (even longer than I planned on since my laptop died yesterday) update on Miranda and Rebel's most recent NOTV experiences.  Warning to all our followers, this one gets a little PG-13 so if you have little ones in your presence you may want to read this later or edit it as you go!

Miranda and Mark are working such long hours at the greenhouse that they really don't have time for television.  However, they also don't get to see each other much, let alone get naked together. As a result of their long hours at work and their non existent sex life, Miranda has developed a nasty porn watching habit; toe licking porn to be exact. She fits it in whenever she can-- sometimes in the back room at the greenhouse.  Meanwhile, Mark pretends to be the strong one in their NOTV deal while he secretly watches the Big Ten Network and tunes in to all of the University of Michigan ladies soccer team games.  He hasn't missed one yet! 

Rebel is all torn up about the final airing of Oprah so much so that he has DVRd all the shows this year and he watches them while eating Haagen Daas out of the carton and crying into his box of kleenex.  It really is a sad sight.  Leslie has been watching Project Runway (plus size) and could give that guy from Man Versus Food a run for his money these days with her increased appetite!

The Constantines are all business as usual in the world of no TV which this week did include two television indulgences:  the Antiques Road Show Washington D.C. (to watch for Aunt Dominica and Grandma) and for the kids and daddy America's Funniest Videos since they were all fairly well behaved last week. 

Vern Out

Sunday, May 22, 2011

Tick tock

Tick Tock, Tick Tock, Tick Tock...The clock is ticking for Miranda and Rebel.  Hopefully we will see some wonderful updates from them in the next twenty four hours, but if we don't I have plans for some great  fabricated updates for them.  Last night Jeff and I watched the movie, Fireproof for our hot date of the month (I know we are kind of lame in the date department). 

Anyhow, it is kind of along the lines of a Hallmark made for television movie, but I think it was an actual regular movie, but I am not sure.  The movie focused on a couple close to divorce and their adventure in trying to save their marriage.  The star of the show was Kirk Cameron and for any woman who is roughly my age that was a real treat.  Man he was one of the hunks of the 80's wasn't he?  Back in the day, I really liked drooling over pictures of him in the Seventeen magazines.  In case you were wondering, he is still decent looking.  I guess I am starting to ramble in a manner that is actually starting to date me so I better sign off.  Come tomorrow you can look for some good creative writing about my younger siblings if they don't beat me to it today.

Vern Out

Friday, May 20, 2011

Back at it

First of all, kudos to Dominica for posting an update.  Kara requested some of your bread the other night at dinner she remembers it from your last visit so the wheat mill was a hit with her!  I think everyone agrees that we would rather hear from everyone how it is going, even if you are not still television free so this can be a lesson to the others (Rebel and Miranda we expect updates from you this weekend otherwise you know what happens...I make something up and my imagination is still out of control!)

Anyhow, I am back at it and that is to say trying to write an update post while watching my children at the library.  So far Hazel has turned off a little boy's computer (he was really upset) and screamed bloody murder right in the middle of story time, twice.  Needless to say we didn't actually finish story time we have been banished to the play area.  Aven is being surprisingly good today.  He even cleaned up at home before we came here without having to be told to do so.  That was a nice surprise.

At our place the television remains off, but I have been allowing Jeff and the kids to watch America's Funniest Home Videos on Sunday night if they have been good all week as a treat.  Then mommy gets an hour off so this will be the third week for that tradition assuming my kids continue to be good and don't blow it in the last two days. 

Other than that I am still reading a TON.  I read to the kids during the day and I am reading for myself at night.  The book club is in its third month of life.  This month we are reading Angry Housewives Eating Bon Bons and it is pretty good.  I am enjoying it a lot.  It tucks a lot of serious issues into a funny light book and after reading 1984 last month I needed a more lighthearted read this month.  Until next time. And wishing for updates from my other siblings so I dont have to get creative next time this is Vern signing off.

Monday, May 16, 2011


I know Vern will be very surprised to see me post. It has been a long time since I posted and as you probably have guessed I have slipped back into my past TV habits.  However, as you may remember it was not my only resolution of the year and I have stuck with several of my health goals this year.  I have not smoked all year.  That's a big one. Also I have kept to a regular exercise program and have been making bread from my fresh milled wheat.  I have not lost the weight I have wanted too but I think sometimes you have to prioritize and the first big change I needed to make was the not smoking.  Now I am free to move on with losing weight and who knows maybe I'll take next year off of TV. 

I am glad to have tried to radically change my TV habits because it has made me more choosy about which shows I watch and if there is nothing on I read my cook books.

We have planted our garden and are looking forward to a few months of fresh grown vegis.


Tuesday, May 10, 2011

Terrific Tuesday!

It is a great day today. A terrific Tuesday!  The television is off and I am spending the morning with Brandi, one of my dearest friends.  I only wished she lived closer so we could hang out more often.  Plus then she could be my nearest and dearest friend and that woukd be very cool.  The kids were well behaved for the half hour drive which is not always the case.  Anyhow, our kids are playing outside in this tantalizing weather and other than an incident whereby Liam and AJ ran over Hazel with the swing, it is going extremely well.  Hopefully it was an isolated incident and the rest of the playdate will be blissful.  When we head home it will be naptime.  Tonight we are cleaning out the fridge of all leftover so there is no need to make dinner plans.  I am thoroughly enjoying this terrific Tuesday and I never did like Tuesday night television so it will be easy to leave it off tonight!

Vern Out

Monday, May 9, 2011


I seem to be fully recovered from my little mishap watching television the other night.  Mother's Day was wonderful!  My mother in-law and I have started a tradition of working out at Ecotrek Fitness on Mother's Day morning (totally fun work-out) and then eating breakfast afterwards.  Last year we went out to eat while this year the guys made us a delectable breakfast!  The rest of the day I spent outside in this glorious weather and today we are doing much the same thing--playing in the beautiful sunshine!  Tonight is book club night and I am the host for the month.  We have to discuss 1984 so other than that it should be a great time with friends!  I didn't like the book much at all, but to my credit I did finish it.
Vern Out.

Thursday, May 5, 2011

I cheated

I cheated. And yes it is every bit as bad as it sounds.  Last night the kids were gone to Grandma's, I was experiencing some major PMS symptoms and I was dog tired from several prior nights in a row spent up with kids (who have a cold--- again) so I cheated.  I watched Criminal Minds while lying nearly comatose on the couch.  At least there wasn't any Haagen Daas icecream involved although if I had any in the house at the time I probably would have been eating it with my spoon from the carton.  Heck I probably would have finished a carton of it. 

Oh the other thing that worked to push me over the edge was the poison ivy I have all over both ankles.  Anytime I wear shoes it is sheer torture. Yes that also weighed into my decision to cheat as well.

Anyhow, I just had to get it off my chest and confess to our readership that I cheated and I am sorry and I will try not to do it again.  I will say this though, Agent Morgan is so good looking that it was just what this PMS saturated, tired old lady needed!  If I were gonna "cheat" he would be the one!

Vern Out

Wednesday, May 4, 2011

The hangover

Let's talk hangovers!  But first things first, I by no means am any type of hangover expert if you want expert opinions about hangovers you will have to look elsewhere. In my 34 years of life I think it is safe to say I have had less hangovers than my fair share. But I do know this:  Hangovers make you significantly less productive than you would otherwise be.  They are productivity destroyers.  I had every intention of writing a nice post about my weekend on Sunday.  Clearly that did not happen since I was busy being hung over on Sunday.  I should start at the beginning.  God created the earth... Oh not that far back sorry.

Yes the beginning to this story starts last Saturday night:  it was the baccelorette party for my best friend from grade school.  I really thought I would eat a nice dinner at San Chez, party for a little, have a couple drinks and head home before the clock turned midnight and I turned into a pumpkin, or something like that.

Well that is not how the night ended up, not even close.  I did enjoy a nice dinner at San Chez, but other than that everything was different that I expected.  I ended up having several drinks, dancing, once again, like an out of control rockstar, until the bar closed and the eighties music subsided.  Then I spent the night at the J.W. Marriot with the rest of the bachelorette attendees: by the time I got home it was post breakfast on Sunday morning. Mommy does not usually do things like this so Sunday I was feeling ROUGH.  I am proud to say that I did still attend the confirmation for Jeff's second cousin and I actually had a nice time since it was at a Catholic Church and there was wine involved with the meal! 

I am thinking that hangovers don't have any type of respect for the aging process.  I never remember having any hangovers when I was younger. And while I have never been a big drinker, I am sure I drank too much at least a few times when I was in my twenties, but I have no recollection of any hangovers back then.  None whatsoever.  The only hangovers I remember are from this decade and they seem to get worse as time goes on.        

The best part of this particular hangover is that it in no way resulted in the watching of our television!  I am still not sure how this was possible, but other than listening to the Redwings for a little while I slept on the couch Sunday afternoon, I did not partake in any television related activities since I last wrote.

Again no intent to plagiarize the hollywood blockbuster, the name just fit today's post.  It has been the longest I have gone without posting on the blog since this little social experiment started and all this happened because of the aforementioned hangover. 

Vern Out